Mystified and Concerned

Of all the things I do on a semi-regular basis, going to Wal-Mart is at the top of the "things I hate to do" list. But it was time, Mother needed too many things that would dictate going all over town for.

I needed a few groceries so while we were there, took my own cart and decided to stock up. Amidst the screaming babies and generally disgruntled population of shoppers, I managed to dissassociate myself from my surroundings and get the job done.

Being known for having panic attacks in that madness, I find this is the way for me to cope with it. BUT comparing prices of various things and making decisions about store brand vs. Wally brand gave me great pause.

HOW DO PEOPLE DO THIS? People who have children and a budget, people who are out of work and drawing unemployment to survive? People with a houseful to feed?

My great grand total came to almost $300. and I feed no one but myself. I don't cook a lot, trust me. These were staples for my kitchen and a few, very few, extra things thrown in.

One more thing to worry about. The economy cannot continue in this way. My own children must struggle to find money for groceries with creative mealtimes and still pay mortgages and utilities.

One more thing, yesterday was Friday the 13th and I had a humorous moment in the pasta aisle. I was trying to get a couple of cans of generic something and every time I picked up a can (from the top) two more fell in the floor. There was a couple deep in conversation a few feet away from me and they stopped in mid-sentence and finally were laughing out loud. I finally put down my purse (a no-no in Wal-Mart) and sat down on the floor to TRY to get this display back to its original form. The mystery finally subsided, as did the laughter of the 3 of us, and the cans were ALL where they should be. I blamed it all on the superstition of the day....

Too Much!

My niece Bunny LIKES this picture of me with double chin intact writing away but I think its' one of the worst ever made.
Anyway, I've been thinking today that sometimes life just seems like it's "too much" for me. I live alone and cannot for the life of me manage to keep up with everything. I truly don't remember how I did it when my children were small and there must have been many more things to keep up with.
There's work. Keeping up there okay. It is actually my weekend off so that is a good thing.
The house. There is always something needing to be done. Many things, actually. Right now there are dishes in the sink and laundry to be ironed. A couple of loads to wash.
The phone is still working even though I guess I would much rather blog than turn around to the desk behind me and write a check. How hard is that? Anyway, the money is there, the simple task is just not yet done.
I still need to get the Mardi Gras wreath off the front door and dig out one for spring. The yard is a total wreck. The iris' are coming up quickly and that bed is screaming for my attention.
Mom needs to go to the Wal-Mart. The dog needs to go to the groomer.
My brother Wayne and his wife need me to drive up to northern Indiana one weekend that I'm off to help plan our trip to Europe next month.
I STILL have not seen the famous 6 year old 2009 Kentucky State Champion wrestler in a meet this year (and there are only two left)!
There seems to be a meeting or some even that I need to attend almost every weeknight. (Even though I do manage to skip out on some of them.)
The invitations I ordered for Mom's 80th birthday event are LATE so getting them out will be late. I should already have mailed the "Save the Date" cards.
It sounds like I am whining (for which I am well known) but I just don't seem to be managing my time well at ALL lately. What is that about?
Then there are those things that I just WANT to do. I want to strip the wallpaper off the main bathroom and paint it. It is so dark and drab. This paper was in that room when I bought this house 8 years ago. I want to really spring clean this year, not just make a pass at it.
I want to lose 20 pounds but I LOVE to eat. Worse than that, I LOVE my own cooking!
Okay, I need to take a time management class or something, but I just don't have time!

Slush for Brains

Been thinking a little today about marriage and my utter failure(s) at that highly overrated institution.  Well okay, I've been to church tonight and got a good dose of scripture referring to the aforementioned.

Once upon a time, I married a great guy and had two wonderful children.  But as time passed, he began to change and I began to change, only not in the same direction.  Our eventual divorce changed not only our lives, but the lives of our children.  If I had it to do over again, I would have stayed in that disaster at least until the children were grown, maybe even always, just for them.  The divorce was still the right thing for us personally, but not for them.  There are sacrifices, and then there are sacrifices.

Then when I was in my mid-30's, I married a man that my family disliked immediately upon introduction.  I never knew why (and still don't) but I was madly in love.  It was a difficult time period (seven years) but I did love him deeply.  He eventually moved on to someone he thought he loved more and that was EXTREMELY hard for me to swallow and get through to the other side.

The other side being where I am now.  I am divorced and have been since he left.  12 years now, I think.  I have finally figured out who I really am and what makes me happy.  My family, my church, my friends and sometimes even my job.  But most of all I figured out that I don't need someone ELSE to make me happy.  I can be happy within myself.  Besides that, I have gotten comfortable with ME and I am no longer willing to adapt to someone else's little peculiarities.

Back to church tonight and scripture.....I made a LOT of mistakes along the way and all kidding aside, marriage is to be sacred and honored between two people who make a life together.  I'm just not willing to risk the hurt again.....

Hope Springs Eternal

Leaving work early today to go to the Dentist for a follow-up following "The Extraction" gave me an opportunity to go for my walk earlier in the day and truly enjoy this teaser Spring day. I took my camera with me to record some of the early signs of spring around our neighborhood. This picture below is one of my tulips pushing through the earth and reaching for some sun. I wonder what color it will prove to be?

I also understand from the weather reports that these cloudy skies I see in this picture are bringing behind them a cold front and that tomorrow will be totally unlike today was, of course. The poor tree suffered a lot of damage from the ice storm but I had a friend with a chain saw who came and took care of the worst of it not long after the storm and the rest will just wait.

After my walk and starting to prepare dinner tonight, I decided to catch up on my blogging friends and thus begins tonight's story.

Long before I ever started to write a blog, I used to read a lot of them. If you are a reader you know how one leads to another and then another. Through that venue, I started following the story of a couple from Nashville with four children who were going through the process of adopting a gorgeous little girl from Ethiopia. http://weloveourlucy.blogspot.com/

Kristi is a faithful blogger and I soon became wrapped up in the comings and goings of the Johnson home and her daily walk with Christ, her family and their efforts to "Bring Lucy Home". After MANY months of red tape and the almost unbearable wait, she got a call today saying their baby's biological mother had returned and changed her mind. She has taken her baby back home with her. I feel so many conflicting emotions on this night. Great aching sadness for Kristi and her family. They had come to love a child they had never held. They have her pictures everywhere, though. Most assuredly stamped on their hearts. I have cried for them tonight.

But there is surely great joy in this mother's home tonight as she is reunited with a daughter she could not bear to part with in the end. It is always right for a parent and child to be together bound by an unspeakable love.

I know there will be another baby for Kristi, but I also know she was in love with THIS baby. This baby who was already a part of her family.

I have not yet met Kristi in person, even though there is an event to which I have been invited that I eagerly anticipate. You see, I already care about her and I haven't even met her yet. I wish I could ease her pain somehow on this night and give her the grace and great parenting skills to help explain this new turn of events to her children in a way that might help them grow and learn.

Kristi is a young woman of strong faith with an abiding sense of family. Her circle of friends is never-ending. She has unfailing energy and a husband she must have created just for her. I am selfish in that reading her blog strengthens me in my faith, at times makes me laugh out loud, but tonight made me cry.

I am praying for the Johnson family tonight.....and for Lucy Lane.

Another Excuse to Party

It seems as I get older I find a need to create fun, it doesn't just "happen" to me anymore. Of course there is always a good friend's birthday or a holiday coming up so that has proven not to be a difficult task.
Last night was no exception. My friend Gail was celebrating a birthday which just happened to fall on a Saturday. GREAT excuse to gather with friends for a good time, plenty of food and drink and just general fun. There's that word again.

Frank and Gwen perusing the menu at Dot's

Several of her friends (me being among them and the designated photographer of the group) gathered together at a local restaurant in the bar upstairs to surprise her. Her poor husband Mike had driven all over town and done everything in his power to delay their arrival so as to give all of us time to get there. He was so funny. She was getting really ticked off and was READY to eat by the time HE made the restaurant decision.

Mike and Gail arriving

Of course she truly WAS shocked and surprised as you can see by the look on her face. It is just so much fun doing things like this.

This is a Family Picture of Mike, Gail and their adopted son Frank


A few of Gail's friends looking really Happy????



Sam Leonard

Another reason we chose to go where we did was because Sam, in the picture above, was scheduled to play in the bar last night. I had hired Sam to sing at my Mardi Gras party this year and everybody really liked him. He's an aspiring musician and on his way up so I try to support him every way I can. He's on facebook if anyone's interested.

She got lots of nice gifts, everybody ate too much and some drank a little :) Proving once again that birthdays can be fun at any age and we don't even need clowns and ponies anymore.

Happy Birthday Gail!

Polly

Kentucky Youth Wrestling State Champion

I said in a previous post in February that I would keep you updated on my grandson Tristin and his wrestling achievements this season and WOW, this is one proud Mimi! He competed this morning in Louisville and actually WON the championship for the State for 6 year old wrestlers.

It was my weekend to work so I didn't get to go (of course) but I was cheering pretty loud from here. It is so bittersweet being a grandmother.

I love them so hard but don't get to be with them as much as I want. I have to work much more than I want to and it steals so much precious time.

He is the sweetest boy I know and he is my heart. I'm just glad all his competitors don't know how precious he is! They think he's "tough" (okay, I guess he is). But he can sure melt my heart in a hurry when he wraps those little arms around my neck.

My cup runneth over.

Polly

Beautiful March Weather

April and Tristin

Kristin and her cousin Austin

5 inches and still coming down!

Today was such a gorgeous day in Kentucky! I didn't have time to look at a thermometer today but I know it must have been close to 70 degrees outside! But lest we forget, I have posted some photos from this time LAST year! Wow, it could surely happen again. They say if you don't like the weather in Kentucky, just hang around a few minutes, it will change. So today I am thankful for the weather and just praying it lasts a while.

Of course, I was at work today and didn't get home until dark from Mother's. I had planned to go to the Home Show at 5 for a "Business After Hours" but was still too tied up at work to get away. I love the Home Shows for all the great ideas I get for fixing up things around the house that I can't afford to do. Well, maybe next year!

As I was coming home from Mom's this evening I happened to notice this flashing message in my car. Heck, I've been driving around Hopkinsville with no GAS! I know I was on fumes when I finally got to the pump tonight. I absolutely just forget to look. How embarrassing that would be! I am old enough to pay attention to those things but I just FORGET!

Okay, gas in the car now and I finally got the mail out of the box. Sometimes I don't do that for a few days unless I am looking for money. Heck, all that's in there is junk and bills so what's the hurry I say???

At least it is on my desk now and I usually roll over to that desk once a week whether I want to or not. (Not today)

Okay, I know I am rambling but I am hungry and trying to avoid the chocolate eggs I bought. Why did I buy chocolate eggs? Because Easter is coming? Well, okay. Easter can come but no other PEOPLE are going to be here. hmmmm, guess I will be forced to eat them.

But I am good. I will wait until AFTER Easter.

MAYBE..............Polly